Return to Her

The Language of Beauty

Have you ever listened to a stunning voice or instrument and wished you possessed the ability to convey the same beauty? Have you admired a piece of art that stirred something deep within you, or watched a dancer move so gracefully that for a moment you couldn't look away. You felt something inside you stir. Emotions rose to the surface. Through their gift, the artist allowed you to glimpse what was in their heart.

There have been many times I have wished for the ability to express myself in that way. I have been gifted with a deep appreciation for beauty in all its forms, yet I have often struggled to adequately express my own emotions and beliefs. My heart has been so full of joy, gratitude, wonder, and love, and yet I have frequently found myself unable to communicate those feelings in a way that truly captures them.

There have also been many times when I have met a woman who possessed few of the characteristics the world would classify as beautiful, and yet I was so overwhelmed by her light that beauty was all I could see. Perhaps this is why beauty and light have become synonymous in my mind.

When I speak of beauty, I am not referring to trends, features, or society's ever-changing standards. I am speaking of something deeper—something divine. I am speaking of the beauty every woman has been endowed with simply because she is a daughter of Heavenly Parents. I am speaking of the light that reflects their nature and character in ways both unique and sacred.

One of my favorite things about beauty is that no two women possess it in exactly the same way. True beauty always reflects the spirit that resides within. It reflects the spirit who remembers who she is, how she is loved, and who she is meant to become. It is an expression of her specific divine femininity. This is why it brings me so much joy to see a woman set aside conventional standards and step into her own authentic expression.

A Dying Art

Have you ever noticed how rare this is?

I have come to realize that real beauty or real femininity has become something of a dying art. It is often dismissed as vanity, weakness, or something childish and shallow. With so many problems in the world, isn't it frivolous to care about feminine and beautiful things? For many years, I believed that.

The truth is that I love beautiful things. Flowers make me swoon. I am addicted to moving music. My home is filled with artistic pieces that remind me of light and beauty. Yet for a long time I tried to hide those parts of myself. It felt like weakness. Surely there were more pressing concerns to care about. Surely maturity meant outgrowing such things. I convinced myself I was being frivolous. What I did not realize was that I was also burying my spirit.

I spent decades trying to make myself more acceptable. I suppressed powerful feelings of joy and excitement because they had been judged so harshly in the past. I looked horizontally for guidance about who I should become and what forms of beauty were acceptable to embody.

I didn't feel safe feeling too pretty. That wasn't acceptable. That was vanity, wasn't it? So instead, I learned to blend in. I was crushing my spirit and didn't even realize it.

The Little Girl I Left Behind

Several months ago, I found myself thinking about the fairytale fantasies I loved as a child. I remembered aspiring to be a princess. I remembered creating stories that reflected that vision. I laughed at myself and thought: "I know, Heavenly Father. I need to let all of that go and grow up."

I was surprised when the Spirit answered:

"No, Kimber. That is who you need to return to. That is where I am"

I cried.

In that moment, I realized that somewhere along the way I had abandoned the sweetest and most feminine parts of myself.

I had mistaken hiding them for maturity.

I had mistaken burying them for wisdom.

I suddenly understood that I would never feel whole until I uncovered her again and allowed Christ to heal her wounds.

When I abandoned her, I also left behind the part of myself that was closest to heaven. I had unknowingly cut myself off from all of the love Christ offers.

The Heart of Femininity

To be clear, I am not suggesting that every woman should jump on the princess train.

Every woman is different. Every woman will manifest her gifts uniquely. For some women, divine femininity may express itself through nurturing. For others, through creativity, leadership, courage, wisdom, beauty, strength, gentleness, or grace.

But whatever form it takes, I believe a woman is most beautiful and filled with light when she embraces and nurtures her authentic self. This, to me, is the heart of femininity. It is the conscious choice to allow the spirit within us—so closely connected to our heavenly home—to shine forward.

It is where God meets us. It is where we begin to reflect the beauty and light of our Heavenly Mother and catch a glimpse of who She truly is.

A Divine Inheritance

Because femininity has often been framed negatively by the world, many women have become afraid of it. Some feel uncomfortable when they encounter it in themselves. Others feel uncomfortable when they see it expressed by another woman. I have noticed that much of the criticism directed toward femininity often comes not from men, but from women who have been taught to distrust or dismiss these traits.

Perhaps that is because there is something powerful about a woman who knows who she is. Every woman has this potential. Every woman is endowed with divine femininity.

Not a single prescribed personality.

Not a specific appearance.

Not a list of interests.

But a divine inheritance uniquely her own.

It was never meant to be buried. It was meant to be expressed, nurtured, and shared. When a woman suppresses those gifts, there is always a cost. She may feel the imbalance spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and even physically.

If this resonates with you, I invite you to ask your Heavenly Parents to help you discover and heal the parts of yourself that have been hidden away. The world needs your specific femininity.

Why I Created Avaiah Petals

My collection of LDS temple dresses will be introduced this fall.

You may notice something different about them.

These dresses were designed with the intention of helping women reconnect with their own divine beauty and practice expressing it.

It is okay to shine.

It is okay to be seen.

It is okay to love the beautiful daughter of God that you are.

You are uniquely beautiful. You are deeply loved. And you do not need to be afraid to embody the gifts God placed within you.

Returning to Her

I may never possess the ability to express myself through music, painting, or dance the way I wish I could. But these dresses are my message to the world. In them, I have placed my hope that every daughter of God might remember who she is.

That she might step into her authentic self.

That she might embrace the divine gifts placed within her before she ever came to earth.

And that through Christ, she might discover that those gifts were never meant to be hidden.

Somewhere beneath the expectations, fears, and noise of the world, she is still there.

Waiting.

For me, returning to her was never about returning to childhood. It was about returning to truth.

And when I finally found her, I discovered that Christ had been waiting for me too. And let me tell you, there is nothing sweeter than coming home to Him.